As we recently honored all Mothers on our special day, I received one of the best gifts that I never knew I needed. A new-ish acquaintance asked me if I was a mom! I was surprised and a little puzzled, but I simply smiled and replied, "Yes, I am". I experienced the strangest sense of pride in that moment though. After our pleasantries ended, we went on our way but I was still smiling... I couldn't wait be alone and think on what had just happened! There was this excitement inside that hadn't been there just minutes before. Where was this coming from and where was it going!?
Was I happy that I'd met a fellow mom, encountered her at least five times over the last six months since that Holiday party, and clearly not ever "showed" my MOM hand? Did this happen intentionally or subconsciously? How had anyone that knew me, not know that I was a MOM? It has been the thing on which I rest my hat for a quarter of a century now. This title was my safe place, my hiding spot, my "If I blow everything else up, I KNOW I got this #handled!"
But when did this shift happen? A little over a year ago, I intentionally set out to make some life changes, find value in ME, and started reorganizing my steps. I (and my inner circle) noticed the effects almost immediately; but this was something different. A new person, met and was getting to know a RENOVATED ME. She and I connected on some buried passions of mine like community, education, and serving. Those passions had been buried under decades of time and the little human lives that I was MOMing. Buried, but still there...waiting to be uncovered and revived.
I had turned a corner in my life's journey! I wasn't hiding behind my children's successes anymore like I used to put up as a shield. This new acquaintance never once heard of the pain or heartache I formerly flashed as some form of ID badge. They've been removed from me like an accessory. Never intending to hide any of the pieces of my mosaic, but allowing the beautiful Masterpiece that emerged to be alive, seen, unchained. I am still ME, but all of me now; and I am GOOD.